Having and facing fear is a normal part of every child’s developmental journey. Fear of the dark, fear of being away from their parents, and fear of the hidden dangers that await under the bed, to name a few.
On February 14th, 2018, once again, we were all faced with the fact that our children live a very scary reality, the possibility of school shootings. One student survivor of the Parkland shooting reminded us all that they have grown up in the post-Columbine world, where active shooter drills are part of their school life experiences.
School safety is once more at the forefront of the nation’s mind, with every school talking about it. Our children are hearing about this from teachers, counselors, and law enforcement. They hear about it on the news, at little league, social media, and even kids church. But, what do parents’ conversations with their children about this topic look like?
The American Association of School Counselors recommends the following:
Try to keep routines as normal as possible. Kids gain security from the predictability of routine, including attending school.
Limit exposure to television and the news.
Be honest with kids and share with them as much information as they are developmentally able to handle.
Listen to kids’ fears and concerns.
Reassure kids that the world is a good place to be, but that there are people who do bad things.
Parents and adults need to first deal with and assess their own responses to crisis and stress.
Rebuild and reaffirm attachments and relationships.
You can find this article at:
https://www.schoolcounselor.org/school-counselors/professional-development/learn-more/shooting-resources
It is important to note that children do not have to be directly impacted by a shooting at their school to be deeply affected from hearing about a school shooting.
A great article from Relevant Children’s Ministry also gives parents great pointers for having these important conversations. The article recommends the following:
Start by finding out what they know
Protect them from too much information
Focus more on their feeling than on the event itself
Understand what they can process developmentally
Don’t avoid the hard questions
Seek professional help if needed
https://www.relevantchildrensministry.com/2018/02/talking-to-children-about-school.html
Finally, taking time to sit with your child, whether they are preschoolers, middle- or high-schoolers, and remind them of the following truth: God is our protector. When I was a child, I always found comfort in God’s promises. Read Psalm 91 together and remind yourselves that,
“Those who live in the shelter of the Most High will find rest in the shadow of the Almighty. This I declare about the Lord: He alone is my refuge, my place of safety; He is my God, and I trust him.” (Psalm 91:1-2)
For your wellbeing,
Sarah
You can find the original post for this blog at https://www.nbacares.org/stories-and-news/taling-to-our-children-about-school-shootings
